


Where we belong

by silveryogis



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Smut, its awkward but they get the job done and then they make each other feel like everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-02
Updated: 2014-08-02
Packaged: 2018-02-11 10:04:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2063871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silveryogis/pseuds/silveryogis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tsukishima and Yamaguchi finally get down to business, and also Yamaguchi doesn't know if he can survive through the entire thing with 1) Tsukki's piercing glare, and 2) his penchant for knocking his knees/elbows/head into Tsukki's general area.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where we belong

**Author's Note:**

> another fic from the tumblr fic challege woaaaahwoaaah. i cant believe i wrote nsfw tsukiyams but here we are and here i am

For the past several months, Tadashi has felt like he’s ready for this.

He’s thought about it a lot, up until this very point, how ready he was—he’s sitting on Tsukki’s neatly made bed, his legs tucked underneath him, his hands in nervous fists resting on his knees. Tsukki sits across from him, a near mirror of him—except he’s staring hard at the adjacent wall with his eyebrows pressed. Tadashi can see him gnawing on the inside of his cheek, like he’s  _angry_ at it.

It makes Tadashi nervous, and even though he knows he’s ready for this, he’s also starting to wonder whether Tsukki is okay or not. 

He’s wondering whether  _he’s_ okay.

Tadashi scoots forward and his knees knock against Tsukki’s and his insctinct is to duck his head down and say  _“sorry!”_ but he manages to keep it in, chews on his bottom lip instead. He chews a piece of dead skin away, and  _oh no_ , that’s probably going to make his lips feel weird—he panics a bit and starts chewing harder on his lip, trying to get at least the rest of it smooth and soft so that Tsukki will think it’s nice, kissing him. 

“Yamaguchi,” comes Tsukki’s voice, and Tadashi looks up at him. “What are you doing.”

The press of his knees feels hot against his. Tsukki looks irritated.

“I’m just getting ready…?” he says, looking down at the bedspread. He sees a wrinkle and he smooths his hand over it, because he doesn’t really know what else he’s supposed to be doing. Kissing him? That seems  _forward_.

Even though that’s the whole reason he’s over here—because he really likes Tsukki and Tsukki seems to think he’s cool, and he wants to kiss him again (and thank god for that  _again_ , because if they hadn’t already kissed, it would probably take both of them at least another two hours before they made any moves towards each other), it seems forward. 

He just wishes Tsukki would kiss him first, because still, even now, even  _after_ they’ve already kissed quite a few times and Tsukki has held his hand, he’s still a little afraid he’s going to decide he’s changed his mind.

Tadashi hunches over, makes himself small, and looks down at Tsukki’s knees. He doesn’t want to feel small, but he does. They’ve been dating for  _months_ and he still can’t really convince himself that Tsukki really, really wants to be here. 

“So.” Tsukki adjusts his glasses, turns his stare back on Tadashi, and Tadashi feels like he’s burning. 

“Should we get…started…”

Tsukki’s jaw clenches. “You shouldn’t have to ask.”

“But you weren’t doing anything…”

There’s an irritated grunt, and Tadashi closes his eyes and feels his cheeks flare with head and then suddenly Tsukki’s mouth is on his, firm and closed and soft. 

Tadahi’s back stiffens, and he exhales very quickly, his eyes wide open. Tsukki squints at him, still kissing him. He pulls away.

“Why are your  _eyes_ open?”

“Your eyes were open too!”

“Don’t open them.” Tsukki puts his hands slowly on his shoulders, and his nose bumps against his. “Stop—stop being  _nervous_. It’s tiring.”

Tadashi nods quickly, and reaches nervous hands forward to rest on Tsukki’s knees. Tsukki says it like that, to him, to stop being nervous, but he can tell that he’s nervous too, because he keeps chewing on the inside of his cheek and he only ever does that when he’s nervous about something.

Tadashi knows Tsukki better than he knows anybody else, and it’s that which helps him relax when they kiss again. This time, it’s not as firm, it’s softer, and Tsukki’s mouth is warm and it feels nice against his lips. Tadashi sighs softly, puts his hands on his waist. They just have to get into it, that’s all. Once they get going, usually, they’re fine, and when Tsukki kisses him, he stops feeling small. Just a little. Just enough.

“Tsukki,” he says, curling his fingers in the front of Tsukki’s shirt. It pulls him a little closer, and Tadashi can feel him running a hand slowly through his hair, down his back, stopping between his shoulderblades. It’s still not the perfect kiss (they’re working on it, they’re getting better, but they’re still not good at not knocking teeth. Or breathing). 

Because it’s their comfort zone, they kiss like that for a while, Tadashi making quiet little noises in the back of his throat and Tsukki licking gently into his mouth. Tadashi can tell just by touching him that he’s tense, he’s tense all over. He doesn’t want him to be like that, he wants him to be relaxed—he wraps his arms around him as best he can and scoots closer as best he can. He bumps a knee into Tsukki’s thigh. Tsukki grunts.

When they kiss, Tadashi remembers that he feels ready.

Just being kissed by him, just being close enough to taste him and smell him and feel his fingers dancing clumsily over his neck is enough to make him a little hard—it’s difficult to tell just by looking at his pants, and while Tsukki kisses him, Tadashi cracks an eye open to glance down at him, to see how he’s doing.

He can’t tell.

“Ah, Tsukki,” he says, panting only slightly against his warm mouth, “I think I might be—”

Tsukki looks at him evenly. “Might be what?”

Tadashi shifts back and forth. He doesn’t really want to say it, so he just furrows his eyebrows in a sort of  _pleading_ look, like he just wants Tsukki to get it without him having to say anything. His cock pushes up against the zipper of his pants, and he watches Tsukki’s eyes flick down.

Okay, maybe it’s not so hard to tell.

“Well.” Tsukki coughs, clears his throat. “That’s. That’s natural, isn’t it.”

Tadashi’s voice is very squeaky. “It should be.”

“Don’t say  _you think_ , either,” Tsukki tells him, tentatively reaching to cup his hand between his legs. “You  _are_.”

“Sorry.”

“Stop saying sorry.”

“Sorry—”

Tsukki rubs the heel of his hand against the bulge in his pants, and Tadashi squeaks again, clamping a hand over his mouth so he doesn’t make noise. He whispers it through his fingers. “Sorry, Tsukki.”

Tsukki gives him a look, but he doesn’t say anything further, just unbuttons Tadashi’s pants, slides the zipper down. All the while he keeps his eyes on him, like he’s waiting for a sign that he should stop. Tadashi doesn’t give it to him. Tadashi thinks Tsukki almost smiles at him, even though he’s getting red faced and very obviously flustered.

It makes him happy when Tsukki gets flustered, too. He feels pretty silly when he’s the only one.

Tsukki tugs his pants down around his knees, and his erection is even more visible in his briefs—he coughs and readjusts it so that it’s more comfortable, and Tsukki watches him the whole time. He even unbuttons his own pants and pulls them off—Tadashi notices his cock, hard and straining in his underwear. Tadashi thinks he chokes.

“Yamaguchi,” Tsukki says seriously (and Tadashi thinks he’s trying to look serious, too, but his face is red and he looks very flustered in general, so the effect doesn’t quite work), “if you’re not comfortable, we can stop.”

Slowly, Tadashi shakes his head. “I don’t want to.” He swallows. “Do you? Tsukki?”

There’s a pause, and Tsukki licks over his lips. “No, I don’t.”

Tsukki comes forward, on his hands and knees this time (Tadashi is still sitting with his knees tucked under him, his pants only halfway down and his cock hard and how the hell are they going to get through this, if they can’t look each other in the eye), and just bumps his nose against his, presses his forehead against his, screws his face up like he’s trying to concentrate on something.

Tadashi thinks of ways to get everything going, he thinks of ways he can make Tsukki think he’s _really cool_ (because that one time, that one time he said he was, he said he was cool and he hasn’t said it since, and he’s sort of thinking he wants to hear it again). So even though he’s nervous, even though his knees are shaking, he pushes forward and tries to kiss Tsukki, hard and good and passionatley, a kiss that would knock  _anyone_ off their feet.

Unfortunately, he just knocks into him in general, and they both fall off the bed as a result and land heavily on the floor. Tsukki swears. Tadashi thinks he probably hit his head on the floor.

“I’m sorry!” he shrieks, clamping his hands over his mouth. “I’m sorry! I was just trying to be cool…Tsukki, are you okay, did I hurt you…I shouldn’t have been so…”

Tsukki rubs his head, and sits up slowly, his eyes screwed shut and his jaw clenched.

“Trying to be cool?” he mutters, putting his hand defeatedly in his lap, looking at him. “That’s not necessary. You’re already cool enough.”

Tadashi feels like he short-circuits. 

“…What? Tsukki?”

“I’ve told you before, haven’t I?” Tsukki says (and it’s so obvious that HE’S trying to act cool now, Tadashi thinks it’s a little unfair that he’s so good at acting cool while he’s so bad), “I like you. Right? So…you don’t. Have to feel. Weird.”

“It’s pretty obvious that you feel weird too, Tsukki…” Tadashi says, smirking quietly, sideyeing the adjacent wall. Tsukki huffs at him. It’s such a small thing, but he feels braver now, now that he’s already knocked the both of them on the floor, now that Tsukki’s reassured him (or, tried to, anyway).

Tadashi flicks his eyes back at him, crosses his legs and reaches forward to take Tsukki’s hands. “Um, me too,” he says. “I like you. You…you make me feel…” he pauses, and he bites his lip and looks back down at Tsukki’s lap. “Worth it.”

He looks back up, and Tsukki’s face hasn’t changed—he’s looking cooly down at him, his hair tousled and his face red and his mouth just a bit swollen. He snorts softly.

“You shouldn’t need me for that, though. You should feel like that on your own, already.”

“It’s true though,” Tadashi says, tipping his chin down, squeezing his hands nervously. “It’s always been true.”

“Yamaguchi.”

“Tsukki?”

“Me too.”

He looks up one more time and Tsukki’s mouth is there, swallowing his breath before he gets a chance to say anything more.

It’s better, after that. They kiss more easily than they ever have, and Tadashi even gets Tsukki off before Tsukki gets  _him_ off; just by slipping his hand into his underwear and jerking him off clumsily—and he only knocks his elbows into him three times while he does it (Tsukki doesn’t knock his elbows into him, but he does accidentally jam his knee into his crotch once, and Tadashi needs to take a few seconds to wheeze, but besides that—completely smooth sailing).

When they’re both finished, spent and satisfied and laying on their backs and panting on Tsukki’s bedroom floor, Tadashi scoots closer, rests his head on Tsukki’s chest. Neither of them say anything to each other, but they’ve known each other for so long that their silence is comfortable. Tadashi remembers laying with him like this when they were younger, too, their heads nearly touching, both of them staring up at the ceiling.

The memory makes him smile, and he nuzzles his head against his. Tsukki rests a heavy arm over his shoulders.

He promises himself, while they lay there, to stop feeling like Tsukki is ready to change his mind, to suddenly stop thinking that he’s cute or cool or whatever Tsukki thinks about him—because whatever it is, it’s enough to make him want to put his arm around him and kiss the top of his head and lay there on the floor with him. It’s enough, and it makes Tadashi feel so good, so _worthy_. 

And he just feels, more than anything that he  _belongs here_ , with him, and by the way that Tsukki rubs his back and pushes fingers through his hair as he drifts off to sleep, he can tell he feels the same, too.


End file.
